So we all know the people who held the purse strings for Dashcon fucked up, right?
Cool! So maybe let’s stick to criticisms of their poor decision making intermixed with ball pit shots instead of:
1. Turning this into a fucking misogyny-fest. Yes, there were a lot of women at this con. Yes, many of them were young. Yup, this a first con for many of them. YOU DO NOT GET TO SAY THAT ALL GIRLS OR EVEN THESE GIRLS ARE STUPID BECAUSE THEY WENT TO A POORLY RUN CON. Are they mind readers? No. Stop it.
2. Arbitrarily yell “Death to Israel" and other hateful shit because you’re an anti-semitic tool. That has nothing to do with Dashcon. Nobody cares if you’re just trolling. You don’t get to act like exterminating an entire race is a joke because Dashcon. Fuck you.
3. Deciding certain fandoms are all bad. A few bad eggs don’t ruin the bunch, idiot. Who gives a fuck that the con runners are into SuperWholock? What the fuck does that have to do with them lying about why they really needed $17,000? Nothing. Just stop.
4. Saying you heard a panel was anti-gay and then acting like it definitely was. Were you there? No? Then shut the fuck up about things you don’t actually know about.
5. Saying only white people were there when multiple sources confirmed the event was actually pretty fucking diverse? What are you thinking with this? Are you just making things up for fun now? Or does a few people being money stupid mean we can call everyone racists forever? No. Don’t answer. I don’t care.
5. Blaming the people who left. Are you shitting me? Guests of the con were told their rooms were covered and then they weren’t. Of fucking course some of them left. Do you realise how much money those rooms cost? A lot. If you ever had to pay a bill in your life you would understand. Ever pay your own bills? Yes? Then you know better. Stop it. No? Then stop talking forever, please and thank you.
6. Blaming the people who DIDN’T leave. What? People wanted a con, they came to a con, and some of them made the best of it. That is not a crime, you shitheel. Take a look at the photographic evidence — there were people there who had *gasp* fun. They are not fools for having fun. There was nothing foolhardy about making the best out of this bad situation.
7. Attributing the mishandling of the con to “autism”. What? No. Just no. People can be entitled, clueless, and irresponsible without being on the fucking spectrum, for fuck’s sake.
8. Acting like 4chan somehow magically used their trolling powers to bring Dashcon to ruination, like anyone who uses that site has the time, desire, or brainpower to make that shit happen.
9. Pretending like Dashcon is your proof that all of tumblr is nothing but SJW idiots who fail at everything because they’re always offended and are furries who watch too much Teen Wolf or whatever the fuck moron shit pukes out of your brain when you open you slack-jawed mouth. Shut up, 4chan. Just because you aren’t to blame for the con’s problems, doesn’t mean you aren’t still complete assholes.
10. Suggesting that all cons now have a ball pit. I know you’re joking but that is a terrible, terrible plan. Seriously, ball pits are the place where all the kid urine in the world lives. You’re going to come out with a rash and smelling of wee. And then you’re going to touch me and it’s going to be terrible. Hilarious ball pit photo manips? Yes. Actual ball pits at cons? Urine sane.
Thank you for your attention in this matter. I now return you to Dashcon 2015, which is already being planned.